

My Favorite Thing Today: “Suckin’ On A Chili Dog”

Jack and Diane but all of the lyrics are “suckin’ on a chili dog” pic.twitter.com/p0w7w0hDTV
— Tom McGovern (@tommcgovern27) February 12, 2021
Michael Henry Wonders On His ‘Oneness’ This Valentine’s Day

With Valentine’s Day just around the corner, we know many folks may be making plans with their special ‘someone,’ but for others it can be an annual reminder that a ‘love connection’ hasn’t happened just yet.
Funnyman Michael Henry was all set to shoot a hilarious “Quarantine Cruising” video skit with his buddy Terry (played by drag queen Meatball) but Henry is in a pensive mood
“I just want to know why I’m nobody’s Valentine?” wonders Henry aloud with a quivering lip.
With perhaps slightly less tenderness than Henry was expecting, Terry responds, “Oh my god, it’s just a silly holiday, you stupid b*tch!”
Henry goes on to share that he’s never actually had a Valentine: “Never had a boyfriend, never been in love.”
It seems our hero has friends who fall in love “so easily,” so he’s been pondering, “What’s wrong with me???”

Henry reveals that his oneness isn’t for lack of trying: “I’ve dated, I’ve played games, I’ve had games played on me…I like guys so much that I’m crushed and heartsick when they don’t like me back.”
Cue Terry with some more stone cold advice deduced from his own romantic history (which apparently includes a boyfriend stealing his passport, but, another story…) which ultimately concludes with, “Don’t be so hard on yourself.”
While it seems sad, Terry does manage to slip in some of those ‘quarantine cruising’ jokes in including a truer-than-true Florida joke and something about an unfortunate glory hole mishap.
As usual, Henry delivers a spot-on snapshot of what many in LGBTQ culture might feel around this time of year without being preachy or heavy-handed.
If it’s any comfort, though, I can admit I went through all of Henry’s dating woes well into my 30s before the universe sent me hot hubby Michael. I always consider those misfires lessons in learning to appreciate hubbs when he finally arrived.
Hit play for a well-deserved mid-day brain break. Happy Friday!
Buzzfeed: Joe Manganiello Reads Thirst Tweets

Are These Santa Cookies Obscene Or An Optical Illusion?

Is this a case of an optical illusion or truly some ‘kinky boots?’
Some moms decided Santa’s boots depicted on a set of ‘Santa Dipped Chocolate Sandwich Cookies’ from Target look like the big man’s junk set out for all to see.
Others though just see some snow boots (with some well-placed frosting).
Target's 'kinky' Christmas cookies have moms boycotting — and giggling https://t.co/SHWDLcWBPw pic.twitter.com/AINKUDDSZF
— New York Post (@nypost) December 4, 2020
The New York Post spoke to one mom, Suzie Fromer, who called the cookies a “definite design fail” and added, “I would not send these to school.”
After sharing a photo of the treats on her Facebook page as a joke, one of Fromer’s mom pals asked, “What the hell is Santa’s penis doing there?”
Nicole Miller of Knoxville, Tennessee, initially loved the cookies telling a Facebook group “Such a great treat to have on hand for parties.” But after a friend pointed out Santa’s boots, Miller admitted she “couldn’t unsee” them.

Credit: Target
But any naughty interpretation of the snow boots was news to Target.
“We have not received any feedback directly on this item,” said Target in a statement to the New York Post. “The design is intended to represent Santa’s boots. We appreciate the feedback and will take it into consideration moving forward.”
In any case, the optical illusion continues on Twitter where some see what they want to see while others think Target moms have too much time on their hands.
Let me know what you think, readers? Are those boots or does Santa look happy to see you?
Why does that snowman have an erection?
— Andrew (@EngiNerd97) December 4, 2020
— Matt Clinton👻 (@mdc9767) December 4, 2020
Lol. Took me a while to figure it out… but once you see it, there’s no unseeing it 😂
— LeftRightOut (@userIDtaken) December 4, 2020
Oh the hillarity of dick boots
— JohnnyManic (@burns7L) December 4, 2020
I think target moms have too much time on their hands..
— K 🎄 (@tismelancholia) December 9, 2020
Um…. Guys they are stockings or boots
— The Good Earth (@Dogstar201) December 21, 2020
I'll take a dozen.
— Mike (@MikeScharf60) December 20, 2020
Just goes to show: once you go chocolate you don’t go back.
— No MAGAots (@NoMAGAots) December 4, 2020
How does a white as snow Santa have a big black cock?
— Magalomania (@Thedeadvotedem) December 4, 2020
Who Will Win The Epic ‘Bad Boy’ Lap Dance-Off?


Funny: ‘Match Made In Hell’
Ok, this was quite clever. Ryan Reynolds’s new ad for the dating app Match featuring Taylor Swift’s song ‘Love Story.’ Reynolds calls it “a Love Story for the ages. Or at least this age.”
Satan: Two zero two zero? 2020: Please, just call me 2020… So, where are you from? Satan: Hell… 2020: Me too.
Beauty And The Beast Parody Scores Bigly ‘Wear A Mask’
Riffing off of the showstopping ‘Be Our Guest’ from Disney’s Beauty and the Beast, Noah Lindquist’s lyrics score bigly. Performed by Lindquist and Ashley Young. Disney’s Beauty and the Beast originally penned by Alan Menken and Howard Ashman.
When Do The Halloween Decorations Come Down?
I took a walk around my neighborhood and realized Halloween was almost two weeks ago. Shouldn’t these scary-time decorations be down by now? Just saying… 🙂

Meme Of The Day: Fake But Funny…
My favorite meme of the day – and yes, it’s fake but pretty funny. It is, however, based on remarks made by Trump during a campaign rally in Macon, Georgia last month. Trump told the crowd he might have to “leave the country” if he were to lose to now-President-elect Joe Biden. “You know what, running against the worst candidate in the history of presidential politics puts pressure on me. Could you imagine if I lose, my whole life, what am I gonna do? I’m gonna say, I lost to the worst candidate in the history of politics. I’m not gonna feel so good. Maybe I’ll have to leave the country. I don’t know.”
"Maybe I'll have to leave the country. I don't know." — Trump on what could happen if he loses to Biden pic.twitter.com/NGrXDwjaSd
— Aaron Rupar (@atrupar) October 17, 2020