Tag: gay life

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Is There Pride Or Shame In The PDA Game?

L-R Michael Henry, Chris Renfro, Michael Fariss
Funnyman Michael Henry’s latest video takes a dive into the sometimes divisive discussion of public displays of affection (PDAs) among the gays. Chris Renfro brings up the topic while hanging out (with perfect social distancing btw) with Henry and Michael Fariss. After some initial confusion on Henry’s part, he’s happy to extol the virtues of public affection: “I love it! Hugs and kisses!” “It’s gross and it’s showy,” says Fariss. Renfro agrees chiming in, “Yeah, I don’t need to see someone sucking face or holding hands at a Jamba.” But when Henry shares that he’s gone so far as having actual “sex” in front of people, our naysayers are totally down with THAT. “Oh, I’m ok with public sex,” agrees Fariss which seems to short-circuit Henry. So, holding hands is bad, but performing oral sex in public is cool? Apparently, these guys view holding hands or a public peck as “inappropriate,” “desperate,” and “phony.” Says Renfro, “That kind of behavior is for private.” After running down a series of scenarios that are either full-on womp-womp or merely affectionate, Henry shares that he likes letting the world know “this is my guy.” “But WHY do you have to let everyone know?” Fariss asks. “I don’t have an answer for you,” adds Renfro. “I just know that when a man holds my hand – it makes me uncomfortable. When I see a couple making out in front of me at the store – I’m uncomfortable.” Like all of his videos, Henry brings up some great questions regarding how the LGBTQ community views itself. One commenter on the YouTube page writes, “‘Public sex is okay but PDA isn’t’ is just a sign of the gay community being overly sexualized but not being okay with love and feeling something in a relationship.” Another responded, “Because we grew up seeing us represented only in adult entertainment.” What do you think readers? Is this a generational issue? Is it a safety issue? Is there pride or shame in the PDA game? Who likes holding hands in public? Who can’t handle it? Let us know in the comment section below.

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Gus Kenworthy: Gay Culture 101

Life in the Twitters. Gus Kenworthy commented on a video posted on Twitter by YouTube star Tyler Oakley where a hot guy in the subway riffed on the current “Finish the lyric…” trend. Said Kenworthy, “‘Oh damn he cute’ and then I realized that I’ve hooked up with him and if that is not gay culture I don’t know what is…” #gaylife

(h/t kenneth-in-the-212)

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Michael Henry & Matt Wilkas Explore ‘The Gay Hello’

Matt Wilkas and Michael Henry in ‘The Gay Hello’
When Michael Henry meets his friend ‘Kevin’ (Matt Wilkas of the web series Matt & Dan) during a walk in the park, a ‘cheek kiss’ hello becomes a matter of scrutiny for Henry. The greeting takes Henry aback leading him to ask, “What was that? That kiss. Was that romance?” Kevin explains he greets all of his friends with cheek kisses – including ‘straight Paul.’ “Little kisses are just a friendly way for two men to show they are ok with being seen as gay in public,” adds Kevin. Henry has previously explored issues like ‘pretty privilege’ and masculine/femme aspects of gay life in other videos.

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New From Michael Henry: The Gay Bottom Mafia Can Find You

Clint Keller in 'Wow, You Have a Beard!'
Clint Keller in ‘Wow, You Have a Beard!’

Comedian Michael Henry loves to hold up his magic mirror to the gay community to show us how ridiculous we can sometimes be.

In his new video short, “Wow, You Have a Beard,” Henry bumps into his buddy Daniel (played by Clint Keller) and is immediately aware that Daniel is somehow ‘different.’

Could it be the new wardrobe? (No.)

Maybe the new Pilates workout routine? (No.)

Perhaps it’s the peace Daniel’s found from meditating? (No.)

Henry zeroes in on the issue: Daniel’s new manly facial hair.

Henry immediately feels betrayed saying, “I thought you were one of us – I thought you were femme!”

Clutching his pearls, Daniel assures Henry he’s still a member of the bottom bunk club.

But it’s too late.

As Henry points out, “They’ve already found you – the gay bottom mafia!” Cut to a shot scanning the park with several gay men (“the hungry, hungry bottoms”) in beckoning positions.

“They can smell your exhuming testosterone now,” says Henry.

Even though Daniel doesn’t think he’s that “masc,” Henry quickly runs down the checklist: hairy chest, deep voice and an ability to curse like a sailor.

Check, check and check!

Worse yet, the ‘TopFinder’ app has found Daniel (“Top located – has beard!”).

Be that as it may, Daniel is flummoxed by his situation.

“What am I to do?,” asks Daniel. “I can’t top all of these men, I have errands to run.”

While Daniel is amazed a beard could hold so much virile power, Henry explains, “It’s your entire sexual persona now – you’re straight-passing.”

How could this be? Daniel is a proud bottom, a Bravo TV watcher, and a ballet instructor.

Finally, though, Daniel does find the one way to defuse his new macho status.

Hit the play button to find out how Daniel gets out of this hirsute headache.

Henry does raise a good question about how gay men label and identify based on choices like dress and grooming.

Do beards really make us more appealing? And do gay men assume fur automatically makes us more ‘masculine?’

You can find more of my coverage of funnyman Michael Henry here.

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Funny Truth: Weird Things Gay Couples Do – Public Vs. Private

Public – salad dressing on the side. Private – pepperoni pizza

Buzzfeed’s waaaay cute gay couple is back with their latest installment of “Weird Things Gay Couples Do.”

This time – what they do in public versus the private. As the clip description reads: “A gentleman in the streets who at home hogs the sheets.”

Hubby Michael and I are guilty of several of these LOL

Public: complicated cocktail. Private: Bottled beer versus canned
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Documentary: “Seed Money – The Chuck Holmes Story”

Chuck Holmes founded a gay porn empire, then tried to use his fortune to help propel the gay rights movement forward — only to find that while his money was welcome, he sometimes wasn’t. SEED MONEY is a feature-length documentary about one of gay cultures most unlikely heroes.

From Gay.net:

For nearly 30 years, Chuck Holmes’ Falcon Studios was the world’s largest producer of gay pornography, altering the way a generation of gay men saw themselves and their sexuality.

“Porn is an important part of the gay community,” says director Mike Stabile, whose documentary film Seed Money: The Chuck Holmes Story will screen at San Francisco’s Frameline Film Festival on June 21, and at L.A.’s Outfest Film Festival on July 13.

The film turns a unique lens on gay history as it tells a tragic hero story. Holmes was something of a gay Gatsby — the self-made man who grew to be admired for his great influence and fortune, yet was privately shunned for the source of that fortune.

But reflecting Holmes’ vision, the early Falcon films featured handsome, athletic, masculine young men, who evolved from the lean, mustachioed clone look of the 1970s to the smooth, preppy, boy-next-door look of the 1980s. Where did gay men of the time discover their personal style? In a large part, from Falcon films.

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Mini-Documentary: Make Now Matter

Created in collaboration with Kenneth Cole and the news folks at RYOT, check out this series of highly-stylized mini-docs that shed light on the hardships their subjects faced when growing up gay.

In the video below, Shawn & Thomas talk on their two very distinct experiences dealing with being gay and in the military. They were the ‘First Kiss’ in Navy history.

Well done and thoughtful.

RYOT works on the philosophy that people are empowered through information and that no matter who you are, you can inspire change by choosing action over passive consumption.

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Panti Bliss At TEDx Event: “All The Little Things”

Must watch video here.

This talk was given at a local TEDx event, produced independently of the TED Conferences.

Panti Bliss shares her experience of the little, everyday things that can have a huge impact on the well-being of gay people.

Panti expresses her thoughts on navigating a world in which the simple act of holding hands can be a political statement in itself.

Partial transcript via Towleroad:

“Everyday I am jealous of straight people because that tiny intimate expression of affection has never once been mine…

I am jealous of that because gay people do not get to hold hands in public without first considering the risk. We look around to see where are we, who’s around, what kind of place is it… are there bunches of lads outside a pub?

I’m 45 years old and I have never once casually, comfortably, carelessly held hands with a partner in public.

I’m 45 and I’m fed up of putting up so I’m not anymore.

I’m 45 years old and I’m not putting up anymore because I don’t have the energy anymore. Putting up is exhausting.

I’m 45 years old and I’m not putting up anymore because I don’t have the patience anymore.

I was born 6 months before the Stonewall riots and you have had 45 years to work out that despite appearances, I am just as ordinary, just as unremarkable, and just as human as you are.

I’m 45 years old and I’m not asking anymore. I am just being… human being.”

Like millions of gays and lesbians, I feel the exact same frustration. With so many homophobes using the phrase “I don’t want it ‘in my face,’ the simple act of holding hands is pretty much alien to me.

I’ve been with my husband Michael for over 20 years, and it really doesn’t cross our minds to hold hands. The world pretty much beat that out of us.

Watch Panti Bliss’ fantastic speech below:

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Gay Rights in the News: The 1990s

I recently posted a compilation by SuchIsLife on Youtube that captured many of the big news stories in the media concerning gay rights during the 1980s.

SuchIsLife has followed up with news coverage from the 1990s.

Topics include domestic partnership laws, outing public figures, banning gays from the military, gay marriage and Matthew Shepard.

Amazing look back.