Trump Twitter Rant Ricochets From Favorite Target To Favorite Target

Donald Trump

Donald Trump began his Friday with a Twitter meltdown that ranged from more declarations of ‘No Collusion’ to bashing Dem Rep. Adam Schiff, back to more “NO COLLUSION” trumpeting the GOP-led Senate investigation that found nothing (quel surprise), and ending up with (wait for it…) a ‘Crooked Hillary Clinton’ reference.

Busy morning for mister ‘Executive Time.’  #whew

Trump Rants About Cohen Becoming A ‘Rat,’ Wonders Why Folks Didn’t “Break Into The DNC?”

Donald Trump went on one of his usual Sunday morning Twitter rants raging about his former ‘fixer,’ Michael Cohen, becoming a “Rat” after the FBI “BROKE INTO AN ATTORNEY’S OFFICE!”

Of course, the FBI didn’t ‘break’ into Cohen’s office. A federal judge authorized a legal search warrant after finding that there was a good reason to believe evidence of a crime would be found in his office.

p.s. They did find that evidence. Cohen was sentenced to three years in prison this week.

The president of the United States just wondered in front of millions of Twitter users why someone didn’t break into the Democratic National Committee offices.

Doesn’t that sound familiar? I’m thinking circa 1972 and a certain Richard Nixon…?

History truly repeats itself.

By the way, Cohen tweeted that the FBI was “extremely professional, courteous and respectful” during the search.

It’s worth noting that Ken Starr has absolutely NO idea what Special Counsel Robert Mueller has found during his investigation.

Also – the Ken Starr/White Water investigation went on for four years. Mueller was appointed to head up the current investigation in May 2017 meaning he’s spent less than half the time Starr took to look into White Water.

Similarly, Starr expanded his investigation far afield from his original mandate. So arguments that Mueller should ‘ignore’ crimes not related to Russia along the way are ridiculous.

When the police investigate a robbery and trip over a dead body, they don’t ignore the body.

Donald Trump Rants About “No Smocking Gun”

Donald Trump

Donald Trump clearly had a terrible weekend after announcing his second chief of staff, John Kelly, would be leaving soon AND his prime pick to replace Kelly, Vice President Mike Pence’s chief of staff, Nick Ayers, publicly tweeted his decision to decline the offer.

So, Monday morning, the Trumpster was all ready to pick a fight. Taking to Twitter, he ranted:

“Democrats can’t find a Smocking Gun tying the Trump campaign to Russia after James Comey’s testimony. No Smocking Gun…No Collusion.” @FoxNews That’s because there was NO COLLUSION. So now the Dems go to a simple private transaction, wrongly call it a campaign contribution,..which it was not (but even if it was, it is only a CIVIL CASE, like Obama’s – but it was done correctly by a lawyer and there would not even be a fine. Lawyer’s liability if he made a mistake, not me). Cohen just trying to get his sentence reduced. WITCH HUNT!”

Legal experts weighed in:

Trump Twitter Rant: More Fake News, Mueller Investigation & Witch Hunts

Donald Trump

Donald Trump has been on quite the Twitter rant this morning.

With reports of Robert Mueller’s Russia probe about to issue new indictments, Melania making a public statement shaming him into firing John Bolton’s Deputy National Security Adviser, and rumors he plans to also get rid of his own Homeland Security chief, I’m guessing someone’s isn’t caring for the latest news cycle…?

The man who is shouting via his Twitter account in capital letters tried to assert that Mueller’s team is a “total mess” and folks are “screaming and shouting at people.”

The inner workings of the Mueller investigation are a total mess. They have found no collusion and have gone absolutely nuts. They are screaming and shouting at people, horribly threatening them to come up with the answers they want. They are a disgrace to our Nation and don’t care how many lives the ruin. These are Angry People, including the highly conflicted Bob Mueller, who worked for Obama for 8 years. They won’t even look at all of the bad acts and crimes on the other side. A TOTAL WITCH HUNT LIKE NO OTHER IN AMERICAN HISTORY!

Why are you SCREAMING???

Trump Twitter Rant: “Bomb Stuff” Slowing GOP Vote Momentum

Earlier this morning, as the nation is gripped with fear over more package bombs being discovered and a nationwide manhunt for a serial bomber intensified, the President of the United States tweeted that “bomb stuff” is affecting vote momentum for Republicans.

The Trumpster also groused about how bots were being removed from his Twitter account (because ‘fake’) and it must be a ‘bias’ conspiracy.

Dad’s Twitter Rant Defending His 5-Year-Old Son Goes Viral

Aaron Gouveia and son, Sam (image via Twitter)

A proud father posted an epic Twitter rant that went viral after his five-year-old son, Sam, was the victim of bullying and ‘toxic masculinity.’

Aaron Gouveia is the proud dad of three sons.

His middle boy, Sam, who Aaron calls a ‘boy’s boy,’ likes all kinds of things. For instance, he’s big on fishing, dirt, trucks and knee drops on the couch.

Sam also likes some ‘girl things,’ like collecting purses because “he likes to carry things around,” and wearing polish on his nails because they “look beautiful.”

I think Sam has great taste in colors, too.

Sam recently wore his red nail polish to kindergarten.

His dad says Sam has “absolutely no concept of nail polish only being for girls or reason to think anyone would possibly have a problem with beautiful nails.”

I’m with you there, Aaron. Sam is rocking that red!

But Sam’s classmates apparently have no sense of individuality or self-expression.

According to Aaron, Sam was “ridiculed for being a boy with nail polish.”

The kids called Sam names all day long and told him he should take it off.

Sam was extremely upset and crying when his mom picked him up from school.

Sam couldn’t understand why the kids made fun of him and was “devastated at how the other kids turned on him.”

When Aaron got a call at work from Sam, who was still crying, dad told him that “his nails are BADASS!” and the only thing Sam should care about is whether HE likes his nails.

I’m liking Aaron more and more here, folks.

But Aaron’s heart broke when Sam asked if his mom would remove the nail polish so the kids at school wouldn’t make fun on him anymore.

Noting Sam’s “huge heart,” Aaron shared his pride that his son has never been afraid to be different because “different has never meant ‘bad.’”

Aaron also pointed out that “this toxic masculinity bullshit is LEARNED,” and learned from parents.

Aaron shared that he and his wife have spent years “preaching tolerance, acceptance, and the importance of expression,” but in just a single day Sam’s classmates were able to teach Sam ‘shame.’

Dad had a long talk with his son, and the upshot was Sam should not only keep wearing his nail polish, but it should be “an even brighter shade tomorrow.”

He also told Sam he should ask the kids why the nail polish got them so wound up.

Alright! Go Aaron, go!

Aaron went on to tell the Twitterverse that his son “is a goddamn fireworks show of a human being” and he had no intention of Sam’s light being diminished by “restrictive bullshit” like this.

Aaron for ‘Dad of the Year!’

Dad also rightfully pointed out to Sam that lots of guys like “Thor & Capt. Jack Sparrow” wear nail polish.

He even threw New England Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski in the mix, although he wasn’t too sure of Gronk.

More importantly, though, Aaron told Sam that what other people think doesn’t matter because “what you wear and how you look should make YOU look good.”

Yaassssss!

Not only did Sam decide to leave his nail polish on, his 10-year-old brother painted HIS nails in solidarity.

You know what happened next – Aaron decided to pain HIS nails as well.

Even though the shade, chosen by Sam, is a bit “understated,” dad liked it.

But Sam is sticking with his bright red because “it’s pretty and good luck for the Patriots.”

Aaron wrapped up his Twitter thread saying that even though “intolerant parents and their offspring scored a minor victory,” they would not “win the war.”

Dad signed off with a shout-out to his man, Sam, letting him know he always has his back.

This reminds me of the popular internet meme – “This is Aaron and Sam. They don’t care about other people’s rigid, intolerant views. Be like Aaron and Sam.”

Now, if Rob Gronkowski would just chime in with a pic of his nails painted red, that might just break the internet.

Trump Blames “Local Politicians” For The Cancellation Of His $92 Million Military Parade

Donald Trump

This morning’s Twitter rant from Donald Trump went after “local politicians” in Washington, D.C. who Trump blamed for the astronomical price tag on his ego-stroke of a military parade.

When the cost of putting on the parade (that only Trump wants) jumped from $12 million to $92 million, the Pentagon cancelled (“postponed”) the ceremonial waste of money.

“The local politicians who run Washington, D.C. (poorly) know a windfall when they see it. When asked to give us a price for holding a great celebratory military parade, they wanted a number so ridiculously high that I cancelled it. Never let someone hold you up!,” wrote the Trumpster.

“I will instead attend the big parade already scheduled at Andrews Air Force Base on a different date, & go to the Paris parade, celebrating the end of the War, on November 11th. Maybe we will do something next year in D.C. when the cost comes WAY DOWN. Now we can buy some more jet fighters!” he added.

To be clear, I’m all for supporting and honoring our military. But instead of Trump getting off on his own little ego trip, how about we spend the $92 million on helping homeless and unemployed vets?

The mayor of Washington, D.C. clapped back at the prez saying she was the one who brought “the realities of parades” to the reality star in the White House.

#Boom

Trump Tweets Caps-Locked Rant At Country That Can’t See Twitter

Donald Trump

Donald Trump shocked many last night as he tweeted a full-on, caps-lock threat to Iran.

According to newspaper reports, Iran’s President Rouhani urged Trump to make peace with Iran.

Rouhani is quoted as saying “American must understand well that peace with Iran is the mother of all peace and war with Iran is the mother of all wars.”

Rouhani went on to warn Trump to stop “playing with the lion’s tail” and threatening Iran, “or else you will regret it.”

And so, the Trumpster’s tiny fingers tapped out, “To Iranian President Rouhani: NEVER, EVER THREATEN THE UNITED STATES AGAIN OR YOU WILL SUFFER CONSEQUENCES THE LIKES OF WHICH FEW THROUGHOUT HISTORY HAVE EVER SUFFERED BEFORE. WE ARE NO LONGER A COUNTRY THAT WILL STAND FOR YOUR DEMENTED WORDS OF VIOLENCE & DEATH. BE CAUTIOUS!”

It’s not clear who Trump was trying to impress with his swagger as Twitter has been banned in Iran since 2009. So, the folks there weren’t reading this.

The Twitterverse immediately assumed some bad news is about to come down Trump’s pike and this was a case of ‘wag the dog.’

As we all know, Trump has tweeted the idea of threatening war with Iran as a distraction many times in the past.

There’s always a tweet.

More from the tweet people:

Some Twitterers took the missive for the unhinged musing that it is and just inserted song lyrics at random:

Trump Twitter Rant: “We’d Be At War If Not For Me”

Angry he doesn't get enough 'credit' for his efforts, Donald Trump tweeted "If not for me, we would be at War with North Korea!"
Donald Trump

Clearly, Donald Trump never received any positive reinforcement during his childhood.

No one must have ever told him any thing was good enough because as an adult in a position of immense power now, he demands praise whenever the mood strikes him.

In the aftermath of a by The Washington Post on Sunday which quoted U.S. officials who now believe Kim Jong Un has no intention of denuclearization, Trump took to Twitter to claim the credit for the U.S. not being at war with North Korea.

“Many good conversations with North Korea-it is going well! In the meantime, no Rocket Launches or Nuclear Testing in 8 months. All of Asia is thrilled. Only the Opposition Party, which includes the Fake News, is complaining. If not for me, we would now be at War with North Korea!”

Trump Attacks Restaurant That Asked Sarah Huckabee Sanders To Leave

President Trump told the Twitterverse Monday morning that the Virginia restaurant that refused to serve White House press secretary Sarah Huckabee Sanders is “dirty” and “needs a paint job.”

Over the weekend, Sanders confirmed (via her official White House press secretary Twitter account) that the owner of The Red Hen in Lexington, Va. asked her to leave while she dined out with a group of people.

Speaking to The Washington Post after the incident, the owner of the restaurant, Stephanie Wilkinson, shared that she asked Sanders to leave, in part, because of the Trump administration’s proposed ban on transgender military service members.

“I’m not a huge fan of confrontation,” Wilkinson said. “I have a business, and I want the business to thrive. This feels like the moment in our democracy when people have to make uncomfortable actions and decisions to uphold their morals.”

This followed a spate of confrontations of Trump administration officials including Department of Homeland Security Secretary Kirstjen Nielsen at a Washington, D.C. restaurant over the administration’s immigration policy and White House policy adviser Stephen Miller at a Mexican restaurant.

Folks were quick to point out to the Trumpster that his own Mar-a-Lago resort has had its share of health code violations.