Randy Rainbow: Wizard Of Oz Parody “If You Ever Got Impeached”

 You know it’s going to be a good Monday when political satirist Randy Rainbow delivers a brand-new parody song!

In this video, upon the cue from Donald Trump, “If I ever got impeached…” Randy launches into his version of the Wizard of Oz tune, “If I Only Had A Brain.”

Happy Monday!

Attorney General Jeff Sessions Finally Claps Back At Donald Trump

Beleaguered Attorney General Jeff Sessions finally clapped back at his boss, Donald Trump, today after the Trumpster told Fox News that Sessions never took "control" of the Justice Department.
Attorney General Jeff Sessions

You could consider this one of those “the mouse that roared” moments.

Beleaguered Attorney General Jeff Sessions finally clapped back at his boss, Donald Trump, today after the Trumpster told Fox News in an interview that Sessions never took “control” of the Justice Department.

Here’s the full statement from Sessions via Mother Jones:

I took control of the Department of Justice the day I was sworn in, which is why we have had unprecedented success at effectuating the President’s agenda—one that protects the safety and security and rights of the American people, reduces violent crime, enforces our immigration laws, promotes economic growth, and advances religious liberty.

While I am Attorney General, the actions of the Department of Justice will not be improperly influenced by political considerations. I demand the highest standards, and where they are not met, I take action. However, no nation has a more talented, more dedicated group of law enforcement investigators and prosecutors than the United States.

I am proud to serve with them and proud of the work we have done in successfully advancing the rule of law.

In related news, Sen. Lindsey Graham told reporters today that Trump will likely fire Sessions after the midterm elections.

Trump: Stock Market Would Crash And “Everybody Would Be Very Poor” If I Got Impeached

 In a softball interview for Fox News, Donald Trump told Fox & Friends talk show host Ainsley Earhardt that he couldn't understand how anyone would impeach "somebody who's doing a great job?"

 In a softball interview for Fox News, Donald Trump told Fox & Friends talk show host Ainsley Earhardt that he couldn’t understand how anyone would impeach “somebody who’s doing a great job?”

The Trumpster went on to declare the stock market would tank and “everybody would be very poor” if he were to face impeachment.

Trump also shared that he feels “flipping” on past associates, as his former attorney Michael Cohen has done this week, “almost ought to be illegal.”

The Donald dodged a question regarding a possible pardon for former campaign chair Paul Manafort who was found guilty of 8 felonies this week.

I’m telling you right now – he’s going to pardon Manafort.

Oh, and Trump gives himself an A+ for the job he’s done. How generous.

Michael Cohen Willing To Speak To Special Counsel Regarding Trump’s “Conspiracy To Collude”

Making the rounds on morning political TV, Michael Cohen's lawyer Lanny Davis now says Cohen is more than happy to speak to Special Counsel Robert Mueller about "Russian collusion" during the 2016 presidential election.
Lanny Davis

Making the rounds on morning political TV, Michael Cohen’s lawyer Lanny Davis now says Cohen is more than happy to speak to Special Counsel Robert Mueller about “Russian collusion” during the 2016 presidential election.

From The New York Post:

Michael Cohen is willing to speak with Special Counsel Robert Mueller about a “conspiracy to collude” with Russia during the 2016 presidential campaign, his lawyer said on Tuesday night.

“Mr. Cohen has knowledge on certain subjects that should be of interest to the special counsel and is more than happy to tell the special counsel all that he knows,” Davis told the network.

“Not just about the obvious possibility of a conspiracy to collude and corrupt the American democracy system in the 2016 election, which the Trump Tower meeting was all about, but also knowledge about the computer crime of hacking and whether or not Mr. Trump knew ahead of time about that crime and even cheered it on.”

That said, its been repeated over and over that Justice Department guidelines say a sitting president can’t be indicted.

But, he can certainly be handcuffed at the close of the inauguration of the next president in January 20121.

Davis told MSNBC this morning that at this time he feels its indisputable that Trump committed a crime.

Lawyer: Michael Cohen Will Not Under Any Circumstances Seek Or Accept A Pardon From Trump

Donald Trump

Speaking on CNN this morning, Michael Cohen’s lawyer Lanny Davis said in no uncertain terms that Cohen would not accept a pardon from Donald Trump at any time.

“Definitively no, under no circumstances” would Cohen accept a pardon, said Davis.

Davis added that Cohen doesn’t want to be “dirtied” by a Trump pardon.

The Trumpster, who thought the world of Cohen for over a decade, has also changed HIS tone as well.

Check his latest tweet this morning:

Former Trump Attorney Pleads Guilty To 8 Counts, Former Trump Campaign Chair Found Guilty Of 8 Counts

Former Trump attorney Michael Cohen (L), former Trump campaign chair Paul Manafort (R)

 Well, the folks in the White House have got to be serious shook at this point.

In a single afternoon, Donald Trump’s former personal attorney, Michael Cohen, pleaded guilty to 8 counts

From The New York Times:

Michael D. Cohen, President Trump’s former fixer, pleaded guilty on Tuesday to breaking campaign finance laws and other charges. He made the extraordinary admission that he arranged payments to two women “at the direction of the candidate,” referring to Mr. Trump, to secure their silence about affairs they said they had with Mr. Trump.

Mr. Cohen told a judge in United States District Court in Manhattan that the payments were “for the principal purpose of influencing the election” for president in 2016.

Mr. Cohen also pleaded guilty to multiple counts of tax evasion and bank fraud, bringing to a close a monthslong investigation by Manhattan federal prosecutors who examined his personal business dealings and his role in helping to arrange financial deals with women connected to Mr. Trump.

Of course, the most stunning news here is that Cohen said, under oath, that he committed a crime at the direction of Donald Trump.

Prosecutors promised Cohen a prison sentence of between 43 to 63 months, although the judge isn’t bound by that agreement.

Cohen also did not agree to a cooperation deal regarding the Special Counsel’s ongoing investigation, but he could in the future. Robert Mueller could, in exchange, recommend a lesser sentence for Cohen.

At almost the same time, 250 miles south of New York City, Trump’s former campaign chair, Paul Manafort, was found guilty of 8 counts of the 18 he was charged with. The judge declared a mistrial on the other ten counts leaving the door open for a retrial on those charges.

Also from The New York Times:

The verdict was a victory for the special counsel, Robert S. Mueller III, whose prosecutors built a case that Mr. Manafort hid millions of dollars in foreign accounts to evade taxes and lied to banks repeatedly to obtain $20 million in loans.

Mr. Manafort was convicted of five counts of tax fraud, two counts of bank fraud and one count of failure to disclose a foreign bank account. The jury was unable to reach a verdict on the remaining 10 counts, and the judge declared a mistrial on those charges.

Kevin Downing, a lawyer for Mr. Manafort, said his client was “evaluating all of his options at this point.”

Manafort faces a maximum of 80 years in prison for the 8 guilty counts. One legal scholar on MSNBC just said the sentencing guidelines would call for between 8-10 years in prison, possibly more since the judge can consider the other 10 charges in terms of sentencing if the evidence was considerable.

Plus, we don’t know if the prosecutors plan to retry the ten remaining counts.

However, I’ll state right now – you can count on Donald Trump to pardon Manafort.

Watch.

Former Trump Attorney Michael Cohen Reaches Plea Deal, Taken Into Custody

President Trump's former lawyer and 'fixer,' Michael Cohen, has reportedly reached a plea deal with federal prosecutors in New York.
Former Trump attorney Michael Cohen

President Trump’s former lawyer and ‘fixer,’ Michael Cohen, has reportedly reached a plea deal with federal prosecutors in New York.

According to The New York Times, Cohen’s agreement may not include a plan to cooperate with federal prosecutors.

Additionally, ABC News reports the deal reportedly includes campaign finance violations, bank fraud, and tax evasion.

At this time, there are no indications if possible violations of campaign finance law, regarding payments he facilitated to several women who claimed to have had extramarital affairs with Trump, are in the mix.

In related Trump news, a jury decision in the trail of former Trump campaign chair Paul Manafort could be handed down this afternoon.

New Yorker: Trump Considered Revoking President Obama’s Security Clearance

Donald Trump

According to a new article in The New Yorker, Donald Trump considered revoking President Obama’s security clearance.

Some of Trump’s most fervent supporters in the White House saw former Obama Administration officials as powerful enemies who threatened the new President’s rule, and they agitated for punishing them by revoking their security clearances. The idea was rebuffed by the national-security adviser at the time, H. R. McMaster, who signed a memo extending the clearances of his predecessors at the N.S.C., Republicans and Democrats alike.

As Trump stepped up his public and private attacks on Obama, some of the new President’s advisers thought that he should take the extraordinary step of denying Obama himself access to intelligence briefings that were made available to all of his living predecessors. Trump was told about the importance of keeping former Presidents, who frequently met with foreign leaders, informed. In the end, Trump decided not to exclude Obama, at the urging of McMaster.

It will come as no surprise that the Donald denies ever considering taking away Obama’s security clearance.

Does anyone believe Trump?

Me neither.

Trump Introduces Hispanic American Border Patrol Agent: “He Speaks Perfect English”

At a White House event today honoring ICE and CBP, Donald Trump introduced a Hispanic American border patrol agent telling the crowd that the officer “speaks perfect English.”

Now, what does that have to do with anything?