Last night’s cold open on SNL took on the wild and wacky rollercoaster that was Kanye West visiting the Oval Office this week.
“So in conclusion, 13th Amendment, Chi-Raq, trap doors lead to the Unabomber, male energy, Trump is my dad, Hillary’s a woman and the media needs to start making this President look good,” concludes Chris Redd’s ‘Kanye.’
“I love you Kanye,” Alec Baldwin’s Trump chimed in. “We have a lot more in common than people know. We’re both geniuses, we’re both married to beautiful women and we both definitely have been recorded saying the ‘n-word.’”
Kinda hard to put the skit into words as it pretty much captures the off event.
At a campaign rally last night, Donald Trump told his minions that it was really Hillary Clinton who ‘colluded’ with Russians to affect the 2016 presidential election.
The DOW dropped by 800 points today. Cars are more expensive because steel is more expensive. Ford Motors are laying off 24,000 employees due to Trump’s trade. Gas is $3 average nationally. But Trump is making America Great Again, amirite?
In an op-ed for USA Today, Donald Trump tells lie after lie regarding Democrats and health care.
Trump leads with a lie right at the start saying Democrats “want to outlaw private health care plans, taking away freedom to choose plans while letting anyone cross our border.”
Dishonestly called “Medicare for All,” the Democratic proposal would establish a government-run, single-payer health care system that eliminates all private and employer-based health care plans and would cost an astonishing $32.6 trillion during its first 10 years.
As a candidate, I promised that we would protect coverage for patients with pre-existing conditions and create new health care insurance options that would lower premiums. I have kept that promise, and we are now seeing health insurance premiums coming down.
I also made a solemn promise to our great seniors to protect Medicare. That is why I am fighting so hard against the Democrats’ plan that would eviscerate Medicare. Democrats have already harmed seniors by slashing Medicare by more than $800 billion over 10 years to pay for Obamacare. Likewise, Democrats would gut Medicare with their planned government takeover of American health care.
Democrats haven’t ‘slashed’ Medicare spending. How could they? They don’t control Congress.
Trump proposed $350 billion in net Medicare cuts in his budget and there were about $540 billion in Medicare cuts in the House GOP budget plan.
Also, Democrats have never said they want to ‘outlaw’ private health care plans.
And finally, Democrats as a party have never campaigned for totally open borders.
It’s just lie after lie after lie with Trump.
This column may break the record for the number of falsehoods from a President ever published in a newspaper op-Ed. Just this tweet alone is false – “outlaw private health care plans” and “letting anyone cross our border” Huh? Fact check: false and false. Come on USA Today. https://t.co/1SPKMztmJL
According to The New York Times, a top Trump campaign adviser sought help from foreign organizations to manipulate social media in Donald Trump’s favor in the 2016 election.
A top Trump campaign official requested proposals in 2016 from an Israeli company to create fake online identities, to use social media manipulation and to gather intelligence to help defeat Republican primary race opponents and Hillary Clinton, according to interviews and copies of the proposals.
The Trump campaign’s interest in the work began as Russians were escalating their effort to aid Donald J. Trump. Though the Israeli company’s pitches were narrower than Moscow’s interference campaign and appear unconnected, the documents show that a senior Trump aide saw the promise of a disruption effort to swing voters in Mr. Trump’s favor.
The campaign official, Rick Gates, sought one proposal to use bogus personas to target and sway 5,000 delegates to the 2016 Republican National Convention by attacking Senator Ted Cruz of Texas, Mr. Trump’s main opponent at the time.
Another proposal offered “a monthslong plan to help Mr. Trump by using social media to help expose or amplify division among rival campaigns and factions.”
Just hours after Judge Brett Kavanaugh was confirmed to the U.S. Supreme Court by a Senate vote of 50-48, Donald Trump told his followers at a rally in Kansas that Democrats “have become too extreme and too dangerous to govern.”
He stoked that divisive rhetoric even more by tweeting the message to his social media fans saying, “You don’t hand matches to an arsonist, and you don’t give power to an angry left-wing mob.”
You don’t hand matches to an arsonist, and you don’t give power to an angry left-wing mob. Democrats have become too EXTREME and TOO DANGEROUS to govern. Republicans believe in the rule of law – not the rule of the mob. VOTE REPUBLICAN!
What you label “mobs” is called freedom. Democracy. They are protests against you destroying American institutions. They are #WeThePeople raising our voices while we still have a voice. We will not stop opposing corruption and injustice.#SundayMotivation#SundayMorning#BlueWave
“Trump’s most powerful tool is that he knows how to wield victimhood. He knows how to offer victimhood to the people who have the least claim to it.”
The Daily Show host Trevor Noah took time between takes to speak to his studio audience about Donald Trump’s ability and talent to turn victimhood against accusers in this new world.
As Noah wisely notes, “People felt, because of Trump, like they were losing their country. They felt like America was losing. ‘Feeling’ is often times more powerful than what is actually happening.”
“One of the richest men in the world and he’s like, ‘We’re losing folks. The game is rigged.'”
“You’re a billionaire, Trump. You were a billionaire at 8-years-old. How are you losing?”
This is really worth your time.
“Trump’s most powerful tool is that he knows how to wield victimhood. He knows how to offer victimhood to the people who have the least claim to it.” #BetweenTheScenespic.twitter.com/1sRr0EGxc4
Stormy Daniels on Jimmy Kimmel Live (courtesy of ABC)
Stormy Daniels dropped by Jimmy Kimmel Live last night to promote her new tell-all memoir, Full Disclosure, and along the way the porn star offered even more details about her 2007 sexcapade with Donald Trump.
Out actress Sarah Paulson (American Horror Story: Apocalypse) gleefully asked if she could stay on stage for the Stormy segment telling Kimmel she would love to play the porn star in the film version of her book.
After sitting down, Kimmel took the conversation right to “Chapter Trump.”
Daniels shared that when she first met the Trumpster in his hotel suite that fateful night, he was wearing silky black pajamas: “I’m pretty sure I thought he was channeling Hugh Hefner. Significantly less sexy.”
According to Daniels, she told him to change.
“I wish you could make him change now,” quipped Kimmel.
“He followed orders much better back then,” Daniels said with a laugh.
Kimmel replied he thought Daniels could still order the Donald around a bit, but Daniels was quick saying, “I don’t speak Russian.”
Stormy Daniels (image via screen capture)
Kimmel couldn’t help but bring up the now-infamous moment during the evening when Daniels reportedly spanked the Donald with a magazine, asking, “What does he do, when you spank Donald Trump?”
Without pause, Daniels responded, “Do you want me to show you? Get up!”
After spanking Kimmel with her book, the late night host paused to pray saying, “Please, God, let him (Trump) be watching this right now.”
Eventually, the chat gets around to Daniels and Trump doing ‘the deed.’
“And you made love,” said Kimmel.
“Gross,” shrieked Daniels. “What’s wrong with you? I laid there and prayed for death!”
Kimmel referenced the passage in Daniels’ book where she had described Trump’s junk as being “smaller than average” and said his penis was “like the mushroom character in Mario Kart.”
The late night host then presented Daniels with a tray of mushrooms and asked the porn star to pick the one that most resembled Trump’s penis.
“Can you hold it up so it’s coming at me at the correct angle?” asked Daniels.
Taking a moment, she selected one of the smaller toad stools saying with a sly grin, “It’s the most accurate depiction.”
Throughout the segment, Daniels showed herself to be confident, smart and quick with a clever line.
Watch below. Daniels’ memoir, Full Disclosure, is available now.
Americans were stunned last night as Donald Trump openly mocked Dr. Christine Blasey Ford at a campaign rally.
After telling the press that she had been “very compelling” last week after her testimony before the Senate Judiciary Committee, Trump questioned her credibility last night.
Imitating Ford and her questioner, Trump said, “‘I had one beer.’ Well do you think it was…?”
“‘Nope. It was one beer.’ Oh good. How did you get home? ‘I don’t remember.’”
“How did you get there? ‘I don’t remember.’”
“Where is the place? ‘I don’t remember.’”
“How many years ago was it? ‘I don’t know. I don’t know. I don’t know.’”
“What neighborhood was it in? ‘I don’t know.’ Where’s the house? ‘I don’t know. Upstairs. Downstairs. I don’t know. But I had one beer, that’s the only thing I remember.’”
President Trump says Christine Blasey Ford’s testimony was “very compelling” and Brett Kavanaugh’s was “really something that I haven’t seen before. It was incredible.”
