Kim Davis Parody – “I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Fundamentalist”

Brilliant parody of the Gilbert & Sullivan “I Am The Very Model Of A Modern Major-General.”

Just the beginning of the most excellent lyrics.

I am the very model of a modern fundamentalist
I’m not merely judgmental, I’m the absolute judgmentalest!
I always follow scripture and I act on God’s authority,
Though marital fidelity was never my priority.

I married first one husband, then two others, then another one
Because I think one man is pretty much like any other one.
I’ve never been too troubled by the dubious legalities
Of sex outside of marriage or of other trivialities.

But when it comes to icky stuff like homosexuality,
I’m always very strident with my Puritan morality.
In short in matters biblical and spiritual and Calvinist,
I am the very model of a modern fundamentalist.

(h/t JMG)

Stephen Colbert’s “All-Inclusive Wedding Cake Toppers”


The Late Show with Stephen Colbert went after the still-lingering crazies who think they will turn back the clock on marriage equality last night.

“Folks, gay marriage is still a controversial issue in this country, despite the fact that it’s not…”

“I think everyone should love whoever they want.

“So, I was miffed when Kentucky County Clerk and forehead magnate Kim Davis refused to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples. But I also felt bad for her when that judge sent her to jail and even worse when she was sentenced to send an afternoon with Mike Huckabee. It’s cruel and unusual,” he joked.

With that in mind, Colbert introduced his own line of “all-inclusive wedding cake toppers.”

Kentucky County Clerk Kim Davis “Becomes” A Republican

In a move that shocked no one, Kentucky clerk Kim Davis has announced that she and her family have left the Democratic Party because “the Democratic Party left us a long time ago,” according to a Friday report from Reuters.

“My husband and I had talked about it for quite a while and we came to the conclusion that the Democratic Party left us a long time ago, so why were we hanging on?” she said in an interview at a hotel in Washington.

Davis is in Washington, D.C., where she is being honored at the “Values Voters Summit” sponsored by the virulently anti-gay Family Research Council with their “Cost of Discipleship” Award for her martyrdom.

Kim Davis Sidesteps Questions Whether Other Religions Deserve The Same Exemptions She Demands

Kim “I love all people” Davis

Professional martyr and occasional County Clerk Kim Davis sat down with Fox News’ Megyn Kelly to talk about her ongoing refusal to follow the law when it comes to issuing marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

You’ll note that when directly asked if other non-Christian faiths should receive similar exemptions to the one she’s demanding, she sidesteps the question: “You have millions of Christians who object to this whole same-sex marriage issue. Are their rights invalid? Are their rights not worth anything?”

She also mentions that there’s “no way” she would issue a marriage license to her own child if they were to come out as gay or lesbian.

However, Davis went on to say that she “loves all people. I have love in my heart for everyone.”

I’ll just leave that right there.

The Daily Beast Uncovers Kim Davis’ One Gay Friend

After rogue County Clerk Kim Davis told the world she “has gay friends,” The Daily Beast sent out a message to those “friends” to raise their hands and get in touch, because the no one believed.

Well, it turns out she does have at least one gay friend. But, these days, he doesn’t seem to recognize the person he thought he knew.

Via The Daily Beast:

Dallas Black of Morehead, Kentucky called The Daily Beast after a fruitless search for the anti-gay marriage clerk said she had gay friends in an interview on Good Morning America.

Black said he’s known Davis his whole life—her first husband is even a distant cousin of his—but said he and Davis became close after she helped him with paperwork at the Rowan County clerk’s office after his mother’s died. While he said Davis wasn’t someone he “would get lunch with,” she would give him advice. Black even had her home phone number.

“Even after this all started, I went in a few days later and we spoke,” he said. “We talked about how each other were feeling, and how we’re gonna be friends even after all this.”

Now he said doesn’t recognize her.

“I really don’t know who Kim is at the moment. I really want to believe that the kind, sweet person who was there when my mom passed away is still there,” he said. “I was friends with Kim in the past, but I don’t know this woman I’ve been seeing.”

Black also mentions that Morehead has traditionally been somewhat gay friendly (as “gay friendly” as you can get in Kentucky) until the whole Kim Davis brouhaha. In part because of the university there, the town boasts a progressive arts scene, Morehead State University and even an LGBT protections ordinance.

But Black says the feeling in the town has changed in the aftermath of Kim Davis’ outlaw behavior. “This is not the home we know. We don’t feel safe now. That’s ultimately what she did. She made us feel like our home was invaded by strangers, and she made us strangers to it.”

Matt Barber: Gays Literally Want To Kill Christians For Not Being Pagan

Virulently anti-gay Matt Barber, speaking on Liberty Counsel’s “Faith and Freedom” radio show abut the ongoing Kentucky County Clerk Kim Davis’ refusal to follow the law regarding same-sex marriage, declares that gays won’t be happy being equal. Barber says that gays literally will kill everyone who doesn’t embrace homosexuality.

At one point he compares the current campaign for LGBT rights to the Inquisition. Seriously.

From Right Wing Watch:

“This whole saga,” he said, “is reminiscent of the story of Sodom and Gomorrah in Genesis 19 … The homosexual men of Sodom and Gomorrah, they surrounded the house and they said, ‘Send them out’ and they pounded on the doors and there is this spirit of anger and lust. This white-hot hatred that we see levied toward Kim Davis and her family and Liberty Counsel right now … the attitude is we demand that you affirm our position, that you call evil good and good evil, that you go against your conscience and what the Bible teaches about sex and sexuality and the reality of marriage as being between a male and female. You must leave all that and come on board with our pagan sexuality or we will literally kill you.”

There’s so much in there that is so false it’s hard to even address. Needless to say, it’s a common tactic of the extreme right to flip the truth on it’s head to try and make their position sympathetic.

The truth is no one would care about Kim Davis if she treated gays and lesbians like everyone else. No one wants to deal with her other than get their marriage licenses, which is the law of the land today.

But Barber continues twisting the truth to the small number of folks who really just want to embrace the hate.

Listen below:

Kim Davis: I’m Not A Homophobe – I Have Gay Friends

Graphic via Memeographs

Rogue Kentucky Clerk Kim Davis gave an exclusive interview with Good Morning America where she denounced the “hate” that she feels has been unfairly directed at her for refusing to follow the law and issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples.

“What people say about me does not define who I am. That’s everybody’s opinion and that’s everybody’s right,” Davis told ABC News.

Davis said she’s been “called Hitler, I’ve been called [a] hypocrite, I’ve been called a homophobe.”

“I’ve been called things and names that I didn’t even say when I was in the world. Those names don’t hurt me,” Davis said. “What probably hurt me the worst is when someone tells me that my God does not love me or that my God is not happy with me, that I am a hypocrite of a Christian.”

Wow, Kim. That must really hurt your feelings. Kind of like how LGBT kids feel when they’re told by “Christians” they will burn in hell.

Davis also shares that she has gay friends. I have some advice for those gay friends – Get better friends.

#KissesForKim Entertains The Interwebs

The hashtag #KissesForKim became a thing this week as these two adorabear straight buddies sent out their request asking folks – gay, straight, bi, either, or – to take a pic giving someone a kiss, then post to the interwebs with the hashtag.

“Dear Kim Davis, We want to let you know that no matter what you do, love will always win,” the guys said. “What we want you to do is you’re watching this video is grab your closest friend, give him a kiss, take a photo or video, and upload it using #KissesForKim, to let Kim know that she cannot win… and that we also love her and think she’s beautiful.”

The world got some great pics along the way. Check out just a few below.

A photo posted by Harvey (@barge_guy) on Sep 17, 2015 at 9:21pm PDT

Kentucky County Clerk Kim Davis Alters Marriage License Forms

Kentucky County Clerk Kim Davis, who continues to refuse to issue marriage licenses to same-sex couples over “religious beliefs,” may have more legal troubles.

Davis, the County Clerk for Rowan County, was famously taken into custody when she refused to follow a federal court order (and the law) regarding issuance of marriage licenses. She was released from jail on the condition that she would not interfere in any way with her deputies issuing licenses.

It would appear that she may not have held to her end of that bargain.

Via Buzzfeed:

The lawyer for Deputy Clerk Brian Mason brought that issue to U.S. District Court Judge David Bunning’s attention on Friday, noting that it “appears to this counsel those changes were made in some attempt to circumvent the court’s orders and may have raised to the level of interference against the court’s orders.”

When Bunning released Davis from jail on his contempt order, he released her on the condition that she not interfere with the issuance of licenses.

In Friday’s filing, Mason’s lawyer added that his client’s concern is that “he does not want to be the party that is issuing invalid marriage licenses.” He also noted that Mason “is trying to follow the court’s mandate, as well as his superior [Davis] ordering him to issue only these changed forms.”

One of many questions unanswered at this point is whether Davis has the authority to change a legal state form.

Matt Baume On The GOP Debaters Take On Kim Davis

I posted earlier today about Mike Huckabee’s rant last night at the GOP debate about Kentucky County Clerk Kim Davis and his cries of discrimination against Christians.

Smart guy Matt Baume goes into a bit more depth in this video about how and why the anti-gay folks got it wrong on the subject of same-sex marriage last night.