Former NFL Player, Hubby & Ex-Wife Blended Family Under One Roof

Jeff Rohrer and Joshua Ross (image via Instagram)

In November, I reported on the marriage of retired Dallas Cowboy linebacker Jeff Rohrer, who became the first NFLer to celebrate a same-sex wedding.

Rohrer has now opened up to People about settling into his new home life raising two teenagers under the same roof with his ex-wife Heather and new hubby, celebrity aesthetician Joshua Ross.

The former athlete didn’t come out until long after his football days. “Being gay was not a part of my life when I played football,” says Rohrer.

But, after years of struggling with his sexuality, being closeted took a toll on his 17-year marriage. He and his wife, Heather, split for 18 months barely speaking to each other.

“It wasn’t that Jeffrey came out to me, but once I figured it out, it was obvious he was gay,” Heather tells People. “He thought it was wrong; he was so angry. He thought his children wouldn’t love him, that he’d lose his job. I tried to help him. I kept trying to tell him it was okay, that it was no big deal. But it was to him.”

But then in 2013, the two decided for the good of their two children – son Dondillon and daughter Isabella – that Rohrer should move back in so they could co-parent as a family unit.

Over the next couple of years, the LA-based commercial producer slowly came to terms with being gay.

In 2015, Rohrer met Ross in at a happy hour and began seeing each other. Six months into dating, Ross asked to meet Rohrer’s children and ex-wife.

Ross shared with People, “It was a very pivotal time in our relationship to be able to take that next step forward.”

Heather didn’t object – “I was totally okay with it.”

And the kids where nonplussed about their dad dating Ross. “It wasn’t really like coming out,” says Dondillon. “I pieced it together that they were dating. And eventually he called Josh his boyfriend. I was fine with it.”

Things progressed and Rohrer proposed to Ross in May of 2018. Two months before the November wedding, the 37-year-old moved into the family’s Manhattan Beach home.

There were adjustments ahead for the new blended family, but Heather says, “Being together for the kids is the important thing for us.”

“It’s been difficult to get to this place, but it’s worth it,” she added.

“We get in our fights, but we find a way to make up,” said Ross. “We’re just trying to do the best that we can.”

Daughter Isabella describes life at home as “one big bundle of very strong personalities, so sometimes we butt heads.”

“But in the end, we’re always laughing,” shares the 16-year-old.

“There are all these different dynamics,” adds Rohrer. “And it’s working out really well so far.”

Heather sums up the situation for People saying, “Jeff and Josh are my family, and we’re a better team together than apart.”

Read the full article at People.com.

Former Dallas Cowboys Linebacker Comes Out As He Readies For Upcoming Wedding

Jeff Rohrer (L) and Joshua Ross (R) (photo: Allen Zeki)

Jeff Rohrer, a former Dallas Cowboys linebacker from 1982 to 1988, will marry his partner of two years, Joshua Ross, this Sunday in California.

In doing so, Rohrer will become the first NFL player – past or present – to celebrate a same-sex marriage.

Rohrer came out in an emotional interview with Outsports’ Cyd Zeigler this week, and in doing so shared the emotional impact the acceptance of his former teammates has made.

Zeigler writes that the 59-year-old had to pause several times as waves of gratitude washed over him talking about how supportive his football family has been as he’s shared this part of his life with them.

”The kindness of my friends and my family and my teammates,” Rohrer told Outsports, pausing due to the weight of the emotion. “It’s just been fucking ridiculous how nice they have been, and how supportive. And how they don’t care about any of that. They just love me, they always have. Nothing’s changed. Nothing’s changed.”

”To know that at a time like this, that they have my back, it’s fucking amazing,” said the 59-year-old. “I never expected it. I figured the world is fucked, but it’s not. It’s amazing. It’s fucking amazing.”

While the reception to his coming out has been exhilarating, it’s a complete 180 degree flip from his days in the NFL.

A second round draft pick in 1982, Rohrer played in 83 games over six seasons for the Cowboys. The entire time he hid his sexuality from his teammates.

“If I had told the Dallas Cowboys in the 1980s that I was gay, I would have been cut immediately,” Rohrer shared with The New York Times. “It was a different world back then, people didn’t want to hear that.”

(image via Instagram/DallasCowboys)

Rohrer referred to his younger, closeted self as something of a ‘monster’ he felt he had to keep suppressed.

“So many nights I cried myself to sleep, feeling like I was the Wolfman, or Jekyll and Hyde, or Frankenstein, some kind of monster that only comes out when it’s a full moon, always living in the shadows.”

Now a successful producer of television commercials, Rohrer met his future husband at Tortilla Republic, a gay bar in West Hollywood.

He says he wasn’t out at the time, just ‘working in the area’ and was killing time so rush hour traffic could wind down. The two men struck up a conversation which led to Ross giving Rohrer his contact info.

Although he’d never dated a man before, he admits the feelings he’d kept at arm’s length for so long had become impossible to dismiss.

“My experience is that people are born gay, and anyone who wants to dispute that I’d be happy to have a conversation with them, including Mike Pence,” he told Outsports. “I’d love to sit down with him.”

Growing up in a conservative Southern California community, Rohrer says the idea of being gay “was not acceptable.”

“When I went to Yale, it was the same thing there,” he added. “And then I got drafted by the Cowboys. What am I going to do, come out then?”

It wasn’t until after Rohrer’s divorce – he has two children from his previous marriage – that he finally allowed himself to explore and express his authentic self.

“When I got divorced, I said the hell with it, I’m going to do what I’ve always wanted to do,” he told The New York Times. “Then I found Josh, and began to openly live the life I was born to live.”

Living that life has given him not only the happiness he’s found with Ross, a successful aesthetician and founder of SkinLab, but the courage to share his story with the public.

”I’m not going to change the world, but we can at least get the message out there that it’s OK and I’m proud of where I am,” admits the award-winner TV producer. “I’m not ashamed. I’m not the Wolfman anymore. My family and friends are 100% behind me. That kind of message can maybe move the ball forward a little bit.”

In 2017, Outsports’ Jim Buzinski wrote that 7 former NFL players who had played in regular season games have come out (Dave Kopay, Jerry Smith, Ray McDonald, Roy Simmons, Esera Tuaolo, Kwame Harris, Ryan O’Callaghan), as well as four more (Wade Davis, Dorien Bryant, Brad Thorson, Michael Sam) who had taken part in either training camps or preseason games.

Click over to Outsports to read Rohrer’s full story. You can follow Jeff and Joshua on Instagram at @joshuaandjeffrey.

Congratulations to the happy couple!

(h/t Outsports)