Tag: not funny

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Ellen Jokes Quarantining In Her $24 Million Mansion “Is Like Being In Jail”

Ellen DeGeneres

Ellen DeGeneres at home (screen capture)
Ellen DeGeneres began hosting her talkshow from her living room this week in an effort to lift the spirits of her television audience. She began by acknowledging all the folks who are still at work helping to keep the world running including “doctors, hospital staff, first responders, supermarket employees, truck drivers and everyone who keeps us going.” Ellen shared doing the at-home edition of her show is for not only her viewers stuck at home but also for her staff and crew: “I love them and miss them, and the best I can do for them is to keep the show on the air.” But things went a bit awry when she cracked a joke comparing her experience quarantining in her $24 million mansion with folks who are incarcerated. “This is like being in jail, is what it is,” said Ellen. “Mostly because I’ve been wearing the same clothes for ten days and everyone in here is gay.”

The moment the words escaped her lips you could almost sense she regretted the reference as she clapped her hands and dropped her face as she said, “Ah, the jokes that I have.” The Emmy Award-winner went on to say she wants to “spread light where there’s shade,” which is a good thing because a LOT of shade was thrown her way on Twitter after the joke fail.

Ellen has caught some flack in recent months for seeming to be out of touch with the average person after standing up for her comedy pal Kevin Hart during the Oscar hosting debacle, and then palling around with former President George W. Bush. As I was writing this article, the video on YouTube was removed, which is probably for the best. At the end of the day, I don’t think an unfunny joke makes Ellen a bad person. Every comedian has a clunker every now and then. But perhaps cracking wise about a pandemic that’s killed thousands and comparing home situations with prisoners who barely have basic necessities might be put on the ‘no joke’ kill list.

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Alabama: Man checks into hospital for circumcision, wakes up with penis amputated

AL.com is reporting a man who checked into Princeton Baptist Medical Center for circumcision woke up in recovery to find his penis had been amputated.  Amputated.

I’m assuming the circumcision was necessary for some serious medical reason.  And I’ll go farther and assume (hope) the amputation was due to further complications while in surgery?

Every man’s nightmare. Wow.

“When the plaintiff … awoke from his aforesaid surgical procedure, his penis was amputated,” according to the lawsuit. The plaintiffs “never gave consent for the complete or partial amputation of (his) penis.”

Efforts Tuesday evening to reach the man’s attorney, John P. Graves, were unsuccessful.

Kate DeWitt Darden, vice president of marketing and communications at Baptist Health System, said they do not comment on who might or might not have been a patient and generally do not comment on pending litigation.

The lawsuit claims that the man was never provided with an explanation as to the medical necessity of an amputation nor was never warned the circumcision procedure could result in an amputation.

The man has suffered additional/extended pain and suffering during his recovery, has spent additional time in the hospital recovering, and has been caused to spend more money. The man’s wife also claims loss of consortium.

Just imagine.

Or, actually, don’t.